One Month
Wow. It's a cool feeling to be here right now. It went by fairly quick and has been a lot easier than I thought. I made it. I made it to one month. One month alcohol free.
It may seem like very little time to some people or may feel like an eternity for others. I have honestly been taking it one day at a time. I have been enjoying moments. I'm trying not to count my days because I feel like that defeats the purpose of all of this but it is hard not to when you know the exact date that you quit. It is nice to celebrate those special days too. :)
I am already starting to feel the many positive effects being alcohol-free has on your body. I am sleeping better at night and through the night. I wake up feeling refreshed and ready to start the day. Don't get me wrong, I am still very lazy when it comes to being a human. However, I'm just not dealing with hangovers every day on top of that beautiful trait of mine. I am finding that getting out of bed in the mornings is becoming a lot easier for me! I am gaining a healthy weight back thanks to eating more regularly. A lot of times I would be too sick with an upset stomach or was feeling too anxious to eat. :(
I have also been experiencing awesome shifts in my body, mentally and emotionally. It's a lot but it's a lot of fun too. This new chapter of being alcohol free and exploring myself, my relationships and friendships, family and how it all ties together is starting to be really cool for me and I am surprisingly remaining very calm and balanced... so far.
At first, when this pandemic hit, I was one of those non-believers... trying to keep everyone else calm, saying "it's not gonna be that bad..." but this was probably because I was secretly freaking out on the inside. Ha. It wasn't until the end of week 2 (early-mid March) that I started being like "okay. this is sketch. this is really happening. stay home." Once it hit me that this was spreading very rapidly and affecting nearly everyone in the world, I got a little bit more anxious. I have been "locked down" or, as peeps are saying, quarantined, since March 23. My last day nannying (until this uneasy and scary experience is over with) was Friday, March 20. First, it's exciting. FREE TIME. Then, after sloth life takes over for a couple of days, you get a little bored. Also y'all, I live alone.
What I am trying to get to is, sometime last week, I realized I was going to be stuck in my apartment, alone, maybe for months... without any alcohol. I felt upset. I felt like "isn't it ironic?" and I also felt a little scared too, because I have alcohol here and if I really wanted to, and got bored enough, I could drink it. Then, I realized I chose the perfect time to quit drinking. This is when the "everything happens for a reason" thing comes in to play and that is one thing that I truly believe in. My will power is at such a strong point right now and I feel so much better that I don't even have the desire to drink. I can also say this: If I didn't decide to quit when I did, I would not be as happy (as one can be) during this quarantine as I am right now. I would be a lot more nervous, a lot more depressed, a lot more lonely, and definitely, without a doubt, feeling a lot more like shit. The universe tapped me on the shoulder at the exact moment it needed to and I am glad I listened.
So, I just wanted to keep you updated on my journey. I am sure there will be bad days but I am not scared of those days anymore. I have already had my worst days pass. Now, it's time for the good ones. Excited to keep living in this moment. Let's keep on keepin' on beauties and, for the love of all things, stay inside. <3
It may seem like very little time to some people or may feel like an eternity for others. I have honestly been taking it one day at a time. I have been enjoying moments. I'm trying not to count my days because I feel like that defeats the purpose of all of this but it is hard not to when you know the exact date that you quit. It is nice to celebrate those special days too. :)
I am already starting to feel the many positive effects being alcohol-free has on your body. I am sleeping better at night and through the night. I wake up feeling refreshed and ready to start the day. Don't get me wrong, I am still very lazy when it comes to being a human. However, I'm just not dealing with hangovers every day on top of that beautiful trait of mine. I am finding that getting out of bed in the mornings is becoming a lot easier for me! I am gaining a healthy weight back thanks to eating more regularly. A lot of times I would be too sick with an upset stomach or was feeling too anxious to eat. :(
I have also been experiencing awesome shifts in my body, mentally and emotionally. It's a lot but it's a lot of fun too. This new chapter of being alcohol free and exploring myself, my relationships and friendships, family and how it all ties together is starting to be really cool for me and I am surprisingly remaining very calm and balanced... so far.
At first, when this pandemic hit, I was one of those non-believers... trying to keep everyone else calm, saying "it's not gonna be that bad..." but this was probably because I was secretly freaking out on the inside. Ha. It wasn't until the end of week 2 (early-mid March) that I started being like "okay. this is sketch. this is really happening. stay home." Once it hit me that this was spreading very rapidly and affecting nearly everyone in the world, I got a little bit more anxious. I have been "locked down" or, as peeps are saying, quarantined, since March 23. My last day nannying (until this uneasy and scary experience is over with) was Friday, March 20. First, it's exciting. FREE TIME. Then, after sloth life takes over for a couple of days, you get a little bored. Also y'all, I live alone.
What I am trying to get to is, sometime last week, I realized I was going to be stuck in my apartment, alone, maybe for months... without any alcohol. I felt upset. I felt like "isn't it ironic?" and I also felt a little scared too, because I have alcohol here and if I really wanted to, and got bored enough, I could drink it. Then, I realized I chose the perfect time to quit drinking. This is when the "everything happens for a reason" thing comes in to play and that is one thing that I truly believe in. My will power is at such a strong point right now and I feel so much better that I don't even have the desire to drink. I can also say this: If I didn't decide to quit when I did, I would not be as happy (as one can be) during this quarantine as I am right now. I would be a lot more nervous, a lot more depressed, a lot more lonely, and definitely, without a doubt, feeling a lot more like shit. The universe tapped me on the shoulder at the exact moment it needed to and I am glad I listened.
So, I just wanted to keep you updated on my journey. I am sure there will be bad days but I am not scared of those days anymore. I have already had my worst days pass. Now, it's time for the good ones. Excited to keep living in this moment. Let's keep on keepin' on beauties and, for the love of all things, stay inside. <3
Comments
Post a Comment