The Power of Numbers

Hey again- it's me. Aren't you so excited? Yes, yes you are. All jokes aside, I wanted to write this morning because today is a special one in my eyes.

My amazing 5 y/o German Shepherd, Hendrix, woke me up at 5:15 a.m. wanting a frosty morning stroll. I then proceeded to take a Freddy Krueger shower and I am currently sipping coffee from a mug that says "cup of gratitude", listening to instrumental Christmas tunes on the tube. It's pretty grand.

That is not why this day is so special though (even though those things would totally make a day special).

Today's date is 12/2/2022 meaning I am 33 months alcohol-free today. That number blows my mind. Seriously. On 3/2/2020, when I decided I needed to stop drinking, I had no clue it would take me on the wonderful journey I've been on. My life has completely changed. Even though I am still who I was, at my core (I've always had a pretty strong sense of self), my physical and mental being has done a complete 180.

I strongly believe in the power of numbers and the universe letting us know that we are on the right track by showing us signs. 33 is that number for me this month.

Today, I am 33 months alcohol-free and in 10 days I will turn 33 years old. I will officially be 33 which means so much to me because I never thought I would make it past 32.

My dad passed away when he was 32 and I was always told he would say that he knew he was going to die young. I, too, always had that feeling. When I was drinking, I was living life fast and putting myself in dangerous situations without ever thinking of the consequences. I would do things my sober self would never think of doing. "Live Fast, Die Hard" as they say and I was truly living up to that motto.

I like to think my higher power and maybe even my dad had something to do with me giving up that toxic lifestyle. I felt it in my bones that if I didn't change something, my life would truly be over. You could say I felt like dying but I didn't actually want to die.

Now, almost 3 years later, I am the healthiest I've ever been both mentally and physically.

Since I am being fully transparent here, (I mean, let's be honest, when am I not?) I'd like to tell the peeps that today also marks me being 4 weeks bud free.

I am sure most of you know that I loved me some Maryjane. It actually helped me immensely during my first couple years of quitting drinking. That first year was the roughest and weed helped with the anxiety and doubt that came along with my decision to quit. It helped me sleep and eat during a time when I couldn't. As always though, my addicted brain started to use the herb as another crutch. I basically replaced alcohol with this other substance.

I fully believe marijuana is a type of "miracle" drug for many and I don't think it should have the reputation that it does but that being said, it is not for everyone, especially people who struggle with substance abuse.

Eventually, it started making me weaker. I wasn't sleeping as well and definitely not eating as well (munchies anyone? give me ALL the candy) and I just wasn't being the best person I could be. My anxiety grew worse and I started overthinking my decisions and honestly, I felt guilty every time I smoked. So, a little over a month ago, after meeting an amazing human in the Counterculture Club that I am a part of (the greatest thing to ever come in to my life), I decided to be real with myself and admit that the best thing for me was to also quit fogging my mind with bud.

A lot of you say I am an inspiration but honestly, you guys are the ones inspiring me. You make me want to keep going, keep helping people, and keep up this sober way of living. I want to be the best version of myself, not just for me, but for my friends and family. You guys deserve that.

Today, I can say, I am the version of myself I want to be. I can't believe that version is a completely SOBER (I can say that now... not just alcohol-free) Shannon but I must say, I am proud that it is.

Thank you all for sticking around and being a part of my journey. This life never stops surprising me and I honestly never stop surprising myself.

Cheers to 33 and MUCH LOVE.